By David Ryser
It's not what you know, it's who you know. (An American saying originating @ 1914)
With the pure You will show yourself pure; And with the devious You will show yourself shrewd. (Psalms 18:26 NKJV)
"Don't you think that's just semantics?" These words were uttered by a precious sister in Christ during a conversation with her and her husband in their home. She was graciously offering me an "out" after something I'd said. Something controversial. Controversial at least in her eyes. What I had said was, "There is a difference between serving God in order to be loved and serving Him because we are loved." Do I view this statement as splitting semantic hairs? No. Absolutely not. In fact, I find the views of our relationship with God contained in this statement to be polar opposites and important because how we approach God in our relationship with Him will determine how He responds to us in that relationship...at least according to Psalms 18:26...in fact, it will define the whole relationship.
As a co-worker once said concerning how to interact with people positively, "Approach determines response."
So, was this interaction the beginning of an argument between this dear lady and me? Nope. The argument ended before it began. I never contend with someone over a theological disagreement. In these cases, I always defer to 2 Timothy 2:23 and do not engage in the dispute. So, my response to her was, "I suppose you could see it that way."
I would rather be in relationship than be right.
This incident came back to my mind recently as a result of a phone conversation with a dear friend...we'll call him Robespierre...during which he gave his opinion about what is needed in the church he is attending in order to please God and see Him move powerfully in the services. Without going into a lot of detail, Robespierre believes that strict observance of certain spiritual disciplines...prayer, reverence in the church sanctuary, and a number of other religious deeds...will enable, and encourage, God to manifest His presence in the church services. Some of the Pharisees of Jesus' day held a similar belief. They taught that if every Jewish person on the planet would observe the Sabbath on the same day even once, the Messiah would come.
Yeah, okay....
Now, Robespierre has put his faith in Jesus and is a genuine Christian. He loves God. And he knows God...has experienced His love and presence in a powerful way.
But Robespierre also tends to be more of a human-doing than a human-being.
The danger in putting doing before being is that it can lead to a person coming to believe that God must be appeased in order to be pleased. And that if He is not appeased, He will be unable...or, at the least, unwilling (I've heard both)...to move among His people. The problem with appeasement is that it is just one step removed from manipulation. "If I do (fill in the blank), then God will/must do (fill in the blank)." Our relationship with God then runs the risk of becoming a business arrangement.
And if that's the way we want it, God will accommodate us.
You see, it's not just about knowing God, although knowing God is essential for being in relationship with Him. It is a true saying that it's not about what we know, it's about who we know. But who we know is only half of the equation. In addition to being about who we know, it's about how we know them. It matters greatly how we know the person we know.
Allow me to give an example from the business world.
The saying, "It's not what you know, it's who you know" was very popular in my childhood and young adulthood. It was used pejoratively in many cases to denote nepotism or favoritism in hiring. But this saying also expressed the truth that employers are more inclined to view a job candidate favorably if they know the person, or if the candidate is recommended for the job by someone the employer knows and/or trusts. Nowadays we call this "networking" in which intentional relational connections are sought after as a valuable tool in the securing of employment. On more than one occasion I have benefited from personal relationships in the pursuit of gainful employment.
A successful pursuit, I might add.
But even in the business world, simply being known is nor enough. Not only must I be known, it matters how I am known. If I am well-known by the person acting as a personal reference, their opinion is taken more seriously by a prospective employer than if I am merely a casual acquaintance.
So even in the business world, knowing someone and being known by them is in the context of connection and relationship at some level. And as it is in business, so it is in the Kingdom of God.
Which brings us back to Robespierre.
I've known Robespierre for more than 40 years. I believe Robespierre has a sincere desire to serve God and to please Him through serving Him. And there's nothing wrong with serving God; in fact, I highly recommend it. But why do we serve? Is it to be loved and approved by God, or is it because we are already loved and approved by God? How do we perceive God? And where does this perception come from?
For many of us, our perception of God...and our relationship with Him...comes out of our relationship with our earthly father.
Robespierre's father was not an unkind man, but he was demanding. And Robespierre strove to win his father's approval through his actions...through service and obedience. As is common with the relationship between fathers and sons (and daughters), Robespierre never felt that he quite measured up to his father's expectations of him. And, unconsciously, Robespierre brought this relational dynamic over into his relationship with God.
And his relationship with others.
Robespierre can be strongly opinionated and demanding when it comes to his relationships with others. And he has strong opinions about how others in his church should be striving to bring the manifest presence of God into the church services. Among other things, Robespierre believes people should be praying more often, and more fervently, for God to show up powerfully at the church when the congregants are assembled.
Prayer is a good thing. I'm in favor of it.
The problem in Robespierre's case is that he is especially gifted to be an intercessor. He spends hours every day engaged in passionate, intense prayer. And because this comes naturally to him, Robespierre expects others to have the same ability and desire that are his by gifting. And he can be a bit demanding about it. And demanding can become judgmental, and even accusatory, if people do not respond to Robespierre's demands to pray more often and more fervently...and if God does not manifest Himself in the church services the way Robespierre thinks He should.
But what if Robespierre is wrong about why God is not moving powerfully in the church services? What if God is not so much displeased as He is uninvited? Unwanted? Undesired? Undervalued? If this is the problem, no amount of religious works will fix it.
Why do we serve God? Is it in order to be loved and accepted by Him, or is it because we are already loved and accepted by Him? How we answer this question will depend a great deal on how we know Him. And the answer to the question matters.
It's not just semantics.
Responses to this article are welcomed. You may contact the author at drdave1545@yahoo.com
